Let’s be honest: money stress can feel like it lives in your body. That flutter in your chest when an unexpected bill lands. The tightening in your shoulders when you check your account balance. The late-night thoughts spiraling into “What if I can’t make it work?”, or the “I should be further ahead by now!”.
If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Financial stress is something so many women carry—but we often do it in silence. And what makes the biggest difference isn’t pretending it’s not there—it’s learning to notice what sets it off. Because once you can recognize your personal money stress triggers, you’re in a much stronger position to respond with clarity, calm, and care.
- The bill.
- The due date for filing your taxes looming.
- The friend sharing their latest business win when your income feels stuck.
- The silence in your relationship when someone brings up the budget.
These can be money stress triggers. And if you’ve ever felt flooded, frozen, avoidant, or over-reactive around money, you’ve met them.
But here’s the thing most advice skips over:
Money stress is not just “in your head.”
It’s in your body. It’s in your hormones. And it’s absolutely something you can learn to work with – not fight against, or ‘just do better’.
Let’s Talk Hormones for a Second
When a money trigger hits, your body often releases cortisol, your stress hormone. This gets your system ready to “survive the threat.”
The problem is, your body doesn’t know the difference between a real or imagined threat … a tiger and a tax deadline.
That’s why your brain might go blank. Or race. Or spiral into worst-case scenarios. It’s biology. Any stress response produces cortisol, and when money creates a stress response, we usually end up with chronically high cortisol levels as a result. This results in many symptoms, including brain fog, overworking and hyper-vigilance.
Eventually many of us reach for a happiness boost from dopamine. A quick online shop. A treat. A scroll. A moment of escape. It’s not about willpower. It’s about chemistry.
But once you can see what’s happening, you’re no longer just reacting.
You can respond – with alignment, clarity, and empowerment.
So, What Is a Money Stress Trigger?
It’s anything that sparks a stress or avoidance response in your system when it comes to money.
It might be obvious – or sneaky.
Here are some common ones:
An unexpected expense (even small) whether or not cash is already tight.
Seeing a partner spend money in a way that feels unsafe.
Having to ask for a refund, raise, or payment.
A feeling that you “should be further ahead by now.”
Uncertainty about what you actually can afford.
Making money and still feeling like it’s not enough.
Triggers can come from your past, your patterns, or even the world around you.
But the first step to working with them is simply noticing them. Without shame.
How to Recognize a Money Trigger (In Real Time)
You don’t need a spreadsheet. You need awareness.
Start here:
Feel your body. Does your jaw tighten? Chest constrict? Do you suddenly want to escape, lash out, or shut down?
Notice your habits. Do you open shopping tabs? Avoid checking your bank app? Pick a fight or go quiet?
Catch the loop. Thoughts like “I’ll never get this right,” or “It’s all too much” are clues you’ve hit a hot potato.
This is where clarity begins. Not by having all the answers – but by being willing to stay with the truth of the moment.
How to Return to Alignment:
Here’s how you begin to take your power back when money stress hits:
Name the Trigger
Say to yourself: “This is a money stress moment, and I can handle it.” That alone calms the nervous system.Pause & Breathe
Give your body a moment to come back online. Deep breathing lowers cortisol. Even 10 seconds helps.Ask: What Do I Need Right Now?
Not what you should do. What would bring you back into alignment? It might be a walk, a grounding task, or asking for support.Create a Gentle Plan
Avoid the urge to fix everything in a panic. What’s one step that would create clarity? Checking your bank balance? Naming your actual income this month? Writing down three non-shaming truth
The Heart of It
Every time you meet a money trigger with presence instead of panic, you build empowerment.
Every time you choose to stay with the discomfort instead of numbing or avoiding, you create clarity.
And every time you choose to respond in a way that aligns with your values – even if it’s imperfect – you are building your own version of money wellness.
This work isn’t about being perfect with money.
It’s about healing your relationship with it. So that it no longer hijacks your nervous system—or runs the show in the background of your life.
Money stress may not disappear entirely. But when you know what sets you off—and how to return to yourself—you can move forward with a sense of steady calm and start holding your money power with both hands.
TIP: This week, notice just one moment where money stress flares—and meet it with presence instead of panic. That’s a win!
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Mariska Reinerink is a Holistic Money Wellness Coach and Business Coach, a Speaker, Workshop Facilitator and Writer and she works with women globally, 1-1, in groups, live and online. To find out more, go to www.yourmoneywellness.com and you can contact her at mariska@yourmoneywellness.com
